If I Could Have One Wish

I’d never realised what I’d missed. I thought I’d had a happy life. Now I’ve been shown what could have been. The others, they all seemed to find it easy to turn their back on the dream. For me it was the hardest thing I’d ever done. Maybe it was because for them the differences were, for the most part, recent. They had, what? A few months difference? A few years? My whole past was different, from the day I was born. Mom and Dad together. A family, holidays, Dad talking to me in my real form, childhood-friends (plural). A… A life.

Could it have actually happened? Had things been just slightly different would my life have turned out like that dream? I used to think my life, well, most of it, was perfect. Now, if only I could have one wish…

The little fox walked over to where her father was working.

“Dad?” the fox asked, but her father appeared not to hear. The fox was quiet for a moment, then its form began to change to a human child.

“Dad?” she asked again.

“Ah, Kimiko. There you are. How was your day?” Her father swept the girl into a hug, the two spending time talking and playing together. But before long the girl became tired and became a fox once more. And her father went back to his work.

And that was how their life was. When the fox wanted attention she would become human, and she and her dad would be a happy family. And when she wanted to be alone she would stay as a fox, and her father would care for her, but as one would care for a pet. But the little fox didn’t mind. She liked spending time by herself, either in the house, or causing mischief outside.

I was ready to stay. It was what I wanted; to turn around and go back to living with my family. I knew it wasn’t real, that it was fake, but I didn’t care. Everything I do is fake, so a little more wasn’t going to bother me. And if I had my memories changed I don’t think that would have been a problem.

If Alex hadn’t killed the Chinese man I probably would have turned around. If Jeremy hadn’t been there I’m not sure if I’d even have followed them along that path.

The others seem glad to be back, Eli’s even whooping triumphantly. Me? I’m curled up on my seat, trying not to let the other see my tears. At least it’s easier to hind my face while I’m in my normal form and not masquerading as a human.

But there’s one thing from this that I want to cling to, one small hope. Mom said she’d be waiting for me. Sure, that was dream-mom, but maybe there was more to it. Maybe it was some magical, subconscious message. Why not? Stranger things have happened, even to us. Or even if it wasn’t, Dad never said what exactly happened to Mom but I don’t think she’s dead. Which means she could still be somewhere in Japan.

I couldn’t find my Dad. I just hope I can find Mom.

The fox scampered towards the door. The bus her father came home on would be arriving soon. And even if he missed that bus, there were several that passed by shortly after. So the fox waited by the door.

The minutes turned to hours, and the hours began to stretch into days. Still the little fox waited for the door to open.

It never did.

If I Could Have One Wish

Ravenwatch: Heralds JC_MUNRO